Most people will never forget where they were on the morning of Sept. 11, 2001, or when JFK was assassinated on Nov. 22, 1963, or when the Berlin wall came crashing down on Nov. 9, 1989.
Blake Outlaw, Kevin Watson and Bill Bastas will never forget the day their wives told them they had breast cancer.
"Getting that phone call and having her ... I mean the words I remember were very vividly, 'Honey, I have cancer,' " Outlaw said.
"We could just tell immediately, it wasn't good. The doctor started tearing up. Her mom, Shannon and I were all together when she broke the news to us," Watson said.
"On that Monday, she was at the hospital and the doctor said point blank, 'You have breast cancer,' " Bastas said.
The prospect of chemotherapy, radiation and hormone therapy hadn't even sunk in as these men faced losing their wives.
Bill and Michelle Bastas were married for 20 years when her cancer spread from her breast to her liver and lungs.
"I had no idea what I was going to be called on to do. I had no idea what it was like to be a caregiver. I was going to find out," Bill said.
Kevin and Shannon were just dating when she found out she had cancer at the young age of 25.
"I get all the sympathy. He doesn't. 'Poor Shannon.' Not 'poor Kevin.' And, poor Kevin! I'm the only one that says poor Kevin," Shannon said.
Blake and Audra Outlaw were married for just six months when she found out she had breast cancer.
"The doctor basically said, your wife may not be with us in the future. And, that's just something that scared me to death, to have to think about not having her around. That fear. It's tough," Blake said.
Through it all, these men said they never considered leaving when things got tough. All three said they're better off having had their lives touched by the disease.
Now, Audra has been cancer-free for almost six years. They have two little boys they never even thought they could have.
"That was the most extreme of anything that we could go through. And, to do that right off the bat. We know there is nothing that could come along that we couldn't go through together," she said.
Shannon had a recurrence of breast cancer that's now metastatic, which means it spread to other parts of her body. She learned of her diagnosis a month before her wedding day. Kevin skipped his own bachelor party in Las Vegas.
Cancer cut Bill the deepest. His wife Michelle died four months after her diagnosis.
"It wasn't Michelle. It was Bill and Michelle. That's the way we were known," Bill said.
By the time Michelle found out she had breast cancer, it had already spread to her liver and lungs. Her battle was short but painful.
"One time I had to virtually carry her to the bathroom, and bathe her, and do all the things that you do when someone is virtually (an) invalid. And she couldn't control her neck. And leaned on my shoulders and said, 'What would I do without you?' And I told her, I made a promise. She didn't have to think about that," Bill said.
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Cancer and the family
These three men stood by their wives throughout their breast cancer.
 
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Michelle died four months after she was diagnosed. Bill said he continued his life in a daze, but felt it was all pointless until he found inspiration in his work as a photographer.
A book called The Smile Never Fades features stories and photos of cancer survivors, in memory of Michelle.
"Maybe if I get their stories, not just their pictures but their stories, their compassion, their fear, their dread, their love, their joy, and match it up and put the book together," Bill said.
Michelle died 18 months ago, which is how long Bill has been working on the book. He funded 300 copies out of his own pocket. And the proceeds will go to Komen for the Cure.
Bill's vision came one step closer to reality just a couple weeks ago when the book went to print.
"Why do I have to do it?" he said.
"Because it kills the most wonderful part of our population -- our wives, our mothers, our sisters."
